My Vibe and my Tribe

I came across this quote a few weeks ago, "your vibe attracts your tribe" I fell in love, and of course being me I wrote it on a million Post It notes to remind myself of that. I've always wondered why people who are super negative about everything are drawn to me like a moth to a flame. I've always considered myself to be more on the positive side. I mean, don't get me wrong, I see the ugliness of the world, and can get fixated on it but in general I try to see the positive. It's the only way to get through life sane I think, is to see the positives. So, what's been wrong with my vibe? Well, now I see that even though I am more on the positive side when it comes to other people, and situations, I see only the negative when it comes to myself. So, I guess my vibe has been pretty toxic, and I was just floating through life unaware! I'm trying so hard to change my stinking thinking. It's so hard, I went shopping yesterday, and ugh to fitting room mirrors. And thrift stores are even more unflattering! So, yesterday was full of me being down on myself. No wonder I feel drained today.
I'm determined to change my vibe. Life is short, and I've wasted so much of mine being miserable. I've never even had one single job I've liked. I've had jobs that were tolerable, but never one where I was happy, felt respected, enjoyed what I did, and got paid enough to live. And I've chosen men and friends who are just not good choices for me.
I want to feel what it's like to really love myself, and feel confident and secure with my life. And I want to have healthy relationships with people who inspire me, and I them. I want to leave my house, and know that no one can rattle my confidence, and no one is going to ruin my day. I've always admired those people who walk in the door the same as when they walked out. Half the time I feel like a whole different person. I admire people who are able to be around toxic people, and kind of just shrug them off.
After last weekends events, I want to be part of spreading more light into the world, we need it. I've had some stuff going on in my life that's been making it difficult to see any light in my own life, let alone the world.
I'm going to get this right.