No Shop Girl

                                          
I randomly saw this video on YouTube, and the timing couldn't have been better. You see, right now I own one pair of jeans, and although it's been a cool summer so far, it seems like it's finally going to warm up, and I need a pair of shorts, or preferably a skirt. Just something short. I am dreading it soooooo much. I've never liked clothes shopping, even as a teen. And, it seems like the last couple of times I've gone shopping, it's been a reality check I didn't want. I've been working on getting healthy for a couple of years now, so I always feel like I expect to be a smaller size, or I expect stuff to look better on me, ya know? I just feel like I can never find, or I don't know what looks good on my body. I feel like I see other woman who are heavier than me looking real cute with clothes that highlight their positives where as I feel like I find and wear clothes that highlight my negatives. And, no matter what my body type has been I feel this way. I think having that sense and flair for fashion is definitely something your born with. And lets be honest, the thinner you are, the easier it is to find clothes. Some women can put on the ugliest, thing ever, give it a little fix, maybe a belt, and they look amazing. And, when I'm not shopping for clothes, I'm able to be happy for those women, and not compare myself to them. But when I'm just trying to find something to wear, it's impossible for me not to compare myself to anyone else.
This is where I realize how pathetically lonely I am. Everyone should have that friend, or cousin, mom, sister, whatever that tells you the truth, helps you find what's best for you, and cheers you up. I don't have that, so it's always a dark time after shopping. I honestly can't remember the last time I've bought anything that I thought looked good on me. I always just settle on the best of the worst. Le sigh.