Yesterday I tried a different type of guided meditation. I don't know if it's actually considered guided, but it had you close your eyes, and listen and focus on a bell and just when you would hear the last little sound, the bell would toll again. I struggled hard core with this one. For me, I feel like I either need a voice guiding me, or silence. One thing I really notice is even when I really struggle, when I'm done and I first open my eyes, I always feel rested, like I took a really satisfying nap. I feel like that alone is reason to go on. I'm no expert, but clearly there are health benefits to meditation, even when your barely focusing!
The other day I had a cup of Yogi tea, and the little tags quote said "The voice of your soul is breath." I found that to be very fitting with the meditation challenge. Sometimes it's easy to forget how good a nice long deep breath feels.
For the past two nights, I've been listening to positive affirmations before I go to sleep. I never thought I was a positive affirmation type of person, but I guess I was wrong. I noticed yesterday morning I felt a little peppier, and a little more optimistic, so I listened again last night, and ditto for this morning. Maybe I'm feeling this way because I'm open to the benefits. In the past I thought stuff like this was for other people. I thought stuff like this could never help me.Nothing can help you if you don't allow it.
I barely know who I am this week, and it feels great. It feels so great to be open to changing my life. I like this feeling of optimism. And I'm feeling other benefits, like I'm feeling a little more confident and a little less socially awkward. To be honest it feels great to be dealing with the after math of a break-up in a healthy way, instead of drinking and smoking myself to death. I feel like the chipper character in one of my beloved Rom-Coms!
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